I feel..WEAK.

Recently I have rebegun my journey with weight loss. I feel that since I am happier in life, I should be more successful with this, but this is one area in my life that I truly feel WEAK. I lack self control lately, and not just with food just in life. I am supposed to be on a liquid diet today and saturday and sunday only soft solids.. mushy foods.. apple sauce, mashed potatoes, cream based soups.. i have to check if I can eat eggs.. But it's ALWAYS so hard to get through this part of the process.
I feel like I've lost control of my self, the one thing that I always had control over, I now don't and I don't like this feeling. It feels like last year made me spin out of control and I don't know what to do to regain control.
Like i used to work out all the time, i usually go in waves but i w as working out 4-5 days a week for a while and feeling great but now all I can seem to do is give my self excuses but I really don't have any good ones left.
I'm debating using weigh watches as a tool to help me narrow down what I'm eating, but I really need food ideas, I need recipies, I need to cook, and hell I need a full time job.
My brain is fuzzy from lack of food right now.. so for now I shall end this..